How to have a successful Jewish Christmas

Christmas Eve
1. Brave the last-minute shopping crowds with your Christian friend who has waited until 4:15 on Christmas Eve to attempt to buy wrapping paper. Amuse yourself by pointing out that Hanukkah wrapping paper is 50% off and by digging through a "Take One -- Free!" bin of fugly Christmas stockings with random names on them.
2. Eat latkes and kosher chicken left over from the eighth night of Hanukkah. Roll your eyes when Mom sings, "I'll be hooooome for...latkes!"
3. Watch It's a Wonderful Life on TV. Cry buckets.

Christmas Day
1. Fortunately, Gotta Getta Bagel is open from 7 am to 6 pm! Eat bagels.
2. Take the annual Walk of What's Open through the neighborhood. ("Want to go on a walk?" "Why?" "To see what's open.")
3. Then eat Chinese food.

Believe it or not, I have actually been putting a lot of thought into my New Year's resolutions this year! And they are:

1. Cook more of my own food, and eat more balanced meals.

2. Volunteer my time, maybe as a Big Sister.

3. Take some sort of class for my own edification, maybe besides ballet.

4. Run a marathon in a state other than Massachusetts, because if I start this year, I can run a marathon in each of the 50 states by the time I'm 73.

5. Be more social; be more spontaneous; and be more socially spontaneous.

Merry Christmas, everyone! And remember what the Muppets say:

"Bless us all, that as we live
We always comfort and forgive
We have so much that we can share
With those in need we see around us everywhere

"Let us always love each other
Lead us toward the light
Let us hear the voice of reason
Singing in the night

"Let us run from anger
And catch us when we fall
Teach us in our dreams and please, yes, please
Bless us one and all

"Bless us all with playful years
With noisy games and joyous tears
We reach for you, and we stand tall
And in our prayers and dreams we ask you
Bless us all

"We reach for you, and we stand tall
And in our prayers and dreams we ask you
Bless us all."