Conversations you will hear only among my friends, while sitting in the massage chairs at Brookstone:

H: "Rachel, do you ever get lower back pain because you have...[delicately draws the shape of an gigantic ass in the air]"
Me: [mouth hanging open, insulted]
H: "Don't be insulted! I have the same problem!"
Me: "You only have lower back pain because you have huge boobs!"